A complete guide to bridesmaid duties

Help shop for a bridesmaid dress, attend fittings and, if required, pay for your dress. Picture: Gift Habeshaw/Pexels.

Help shop for a bridesmaid dress, attend fittings and, if required, pay for your dress. Picture: Gift Habeshaw/Pexels.

Published Aug 23, 2021

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Being a bridesmaid is a wonderful honour but it’s about more than holding a pretty bouquet and walking down the aisle.

Now that you’ve been chosen, it’s time to start preparing for what this role means. This list is your guide leading up to the big day, it also includes important duties you’ll want to carry out for the bride at the wedding.

Pre-wedding duties

Pick a bridesmaids dress

Help shop for a bridesmaid dress, attend fittings and, if required, pay for your dress. This will also include doing some shopping alone – for accessories and shoes. You can wear ones you own but they will need to be approved by the bride. The minor details can be ironed out via a group chat dedicated to all things bride and bridesmaids.

Plan bridal shower

A bridal shower party is held anywhere from a few months to three weeks before the wedding. The sole purpose is to celebrate the bride and shower her with presents and spoils in the run-up to the big day. This usually consists of something along the lines of a spa getaway with just the girls or a high tea with aunts, cousins, and/or friends of the bride, depending on what they want.

Expectations for the day should be discussed before the event – from deciding on a theme and destination to the budget as well as footing the bill for hotel stays, flights, decorations and any other costs they may surface.

However, the main events of the day can be a surprise if the bride wishes, so be sure to have a separate group chat to discuss the finer details. This will help take away some of the stress of planning.

Bachelorette party

A night of partying or a classy soiree, the event is to celebrate the bride’s farewell to singlehood. Although most of the planning usually falls on the maid/matron of honour, the rest of the ladies are expected to pitch in with ideas, research, offer feedback and, on the day, help set up and assist with the hostess duties. From reservations right down to the food and drinks, certain elements should be approved with the bride beforehand, even if the event is going to be a surprise.

Help with wedding tasks

The maid of honour may be given specific wedding-planning duties. This is to help lighten the load of the bride and groom to allow them to tackle the heftier tasks. Whether it’s picking up the bridesmaid dresses, booking reservations or viewing venues for rehearsal dinners, by working as a team more can be achieved. If you have the time, offer your assistance as it would mean the world to them.

Attend the rehearsal and rehearsal dinner

Not all weddings have a rehearsal or rehearsal dinner, but if the events have been planned, it is of utmost importance that the bridesmaids attend. They are supposed to help break the ice on the wedding day, easing pressure on the bride and groom as well as the rest of the wedding party.

Although most weddings follow a similar train of events, every wedding is unique and the couple may want to do something different. Attending will help you know where to stand, the order in which to exit the venue and what is expected of you.

Wedding day duties

Arriving early for hair and make-up

It is such a fun and special bonding experience for the bride and all her best friends and family to be together before the ceremony. If you have hair and make-up appointments, make sure you arrive on time. During the pre-wedding day dress up, champagne is usually popped, pictures are taken with a photographer and the bride is dressed. Be ready to help fasten laces, buckle shoes and wipe away tears as it can be an emotional time.

Picture taking

After the wedding ceremony, most guests will head to the reception, but be prepared to stick around for pictures. At the reception, more pictures will be taken with the bridesmaids and the entire wedding party. When you aren’t participating, stick around to carry bouquets, purses and simply just hype up the happy couple.

Dance

There’s nothing worse than a dead dance floor at a party, especially at a wedding. Be a good sport, don’t sit down when the dance floor is open, get out there and drag friends and family onto the floor with you. This will get people out of their shells and liven up the energy for the night.

Stay behind to help

At the end of the night, there are presents that need to be packed into cars, keepsakes from the reception that the couple may want to take with them before things are packed, extra food and decor that guests may be allowed to take home. Stick around to assist with these. If families need help to navigate the venue or finding their taxi, offer your assistance rather than letting guests worry the couple on their big day.

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marriage